| Trephi in the News!
Since it's likely the Trephi would one day have their presence made public, I'm sure there would be shameless offers from marketers of all kinds to stick a Trephyn face with their products.
Here is your chance to send me any funny thoughts you might have for advertisements or news headlines that might contain references to the Trephi.
All characters are fair game. :)
Hopefully this will give you a few laughs, or perhaps inspire some art.
Apologies in advance to any publications whose names may be represented on this page. |
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| Headline: |
| Mr. John Drake and Ms.Dariena Nevatu wish to announce their wedding/mating. The ceremony with vows will take place at an undisclosed location. Only invited guest will be in attendance. The couple will be honeymooning off world. |
| —Submitted by Winterkill |
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| Headline: |
Congratulations are in order for Emissaries Greyson Sanborn and Nicia Sanborn for giving birth to the first interspecies child. Properly named Matthias sanborn. Matthias was born yesterday afternoon at 6:30pm. At the Alexandra memorial hospital, Matthias is reported to be more Trephi than human in appearance. But looks a lot like his father Grayson sanborn. He was weighed in at a whopping 10 pounds. Mother and child are reported to be safe and are going back to Synac tomorrow afternoon
-Tyler Johnson
Reporter for Washington
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| —Submitted by KevinRaccoon |
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| News headline. |
 Patrons of tbe Sheetz gas station reported a suspicious vehicle parked outside the store late last week. By the time authorities arrived the vehicle and it's driver were gone. As of yet no explinations have been given. |
| —Submitted by Dariena |
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| Headline: The UPC Wants You! |
Sick of your planet? Global peace getting you down?
Join up! Join Up! See the Universe!
Join The Universal Peace Core and help enforce throughout the Galaxy!
Recruiting urgently for Tours Of Duty on the following unsettled planets: K'raken, Jsl'fa, 'Et
Volunteers* desperately required for Tours Of Duty on: Terra
---
*Hazardous Duty Pay applies
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| —Submitted by Redturtle |
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| Headline: Trephyn Assaulted at Further Confusion |
Jheryn Rhomalae, a native of the Synacian colony world of T'lan Meth and member of the Synacian Defense Force, was attacked at Further Confusion yesterday by a mob of angry human fursuiters. "It was the strangest thing I'd ever seen," said Rhomalae. "They kept yelling, 'How'd you make it look so real?"
Mr. Rhomalae expressed his gratitude to the security staff at the convention, and to Emissary Loruun, his personal combat instructor in SDF, for enabling him to end the confrontation without serious injury.
Rhomalae plans to attend Anthrocon later this summer, but he warns, "I'm definitely bringing my stunner." |
| —Submitted by Stilghar |
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| Ad. |
Furries, wish you were like the Trephi?
SDF holomatrixes are now available for civilian use. Look like the fur of your dreams, and when you get tired just turn it off. Perfect for FurCons, costume parties, and when you're the lone human of a group. |
| —Submitted by John Pesterfield |
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| Personnals ad. |
SBBM seeking SF
Wanted: Female for lonely Trephyn.
Must be able to cook.
My likes are flights thru space and antiques. If you fit this please contact Nersal at www.trephynembassy.com/NersalVarlon |
| —Submitted by Bluefox |
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| Headline. |
| Today another Human Supremicist group was put out of action. The ATF assault team, led by Mr. and Mrs. McNiall (a mixed Human-Trephyn couple) managed to take the organization's compound in a very short period, with no loss of life on either side.. |
| —Submitted by Faolan |
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| Ad. |
| Tired of rushing around the Universe at Light speed. Take a drive and see the planet at less than 60mph. At Alien Custom, we can take the vechile of your choice and fix it to your needs, regardless of race. Fur or tails present no problems |
| —Submitted by Bear |
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| Headline. |
| This year's Homecoming King and Queen are Mr. Michael Sinclair, and Ms. Lakia Venesuri. Mr' Sinclair is a native, and also the fencing team's captain. Ms. Venesuri is a Trephyn exchange student, and president of the Science Club.... |
| —Submitted by Faolan |
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| Ad. |
Want to see the universe not just the world? The become a member of the SDF ranks. Go to your local embassy and apply. Then you will be on your way to a great job where you will be trained with the hottest equipment and the most knowledgeable people. Don't let this pass you by, because once it's gone it's gone forever.
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| —Submitted by Bluefox |
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| Commercial featuring Meran. |
| Concerned about unsightly grey fur. Looking much older then you feel. Say goodbye to grey with Just for Trephi fur coloring . Looks so natural no one will ever know. |
| —Submitted by Lilly |
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| Today Magazine. |
| Life and loves of the Furry kinds. Today topic The Trephi and the Human thay Love... |
| —Submitted by Saber Storm |
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| Ad. |
| When your pacage has to be there in five minutes or your company is history. Use Trephi Express and it will be there or double your money back. |
| —Submitted by Bluefox |
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| Ad. |
Cloging drains with hair is no funny matter. Use super drain bomb to clear those drains fast and easy. Only $12.99 a bottle that can treat up to 20 times.
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| —Submitted by Fastclaw |
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| Legal ad. |
WERE YOU ABDUCTED?
Synacian Alliance Legal experts are searching for Humans who were abducted for experimentation by raiders from the Klizul Concordium. For more information, please contact your local Synacian Embassy or visit www.webelieveyou.com. |
| —Submitted by Stilghar |
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| News Headline. |
| The annual Air Races were once again won by a Trephi this year. The Trephi-modified P-38 easily out ran its competition, completing the course in another world record time.... |
| —Submitted by Faolan |
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| Ad for Trephi products. |
| Going to visit human friends with dogs and worried about fleas? Not anymore! Our new line of flea collars are indistinguishable from fine quality necklaces and bracelets. Enjoy your visit without having to cringe whenever their mutt jumps on you. |
| —Submitted by Ruka |
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| Auto insurance ad. |
| ...the Draken was clocked doing around 89,000mph in a 55mph zone and Dariena has no proof of insurance on her. Driving with out insurance is a gamble... |
| —Submitted by Bluefox |
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| From Playboy magazine. |
| For those of you with a taste for the Dark Side, they don't get much darker than Ms. Shia Autain! |
| —Submitted by Stilghar |
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| From Playboy magazine. |
| Next month: If you like redheads, you'll love our exclusive interview with SDF Commander Dariena Nevatu. This foxy lady is out of this world! |
| —Submitted by Dariena |
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| Last Updated: Mon, Jan 12, 2004 |
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Patrons of tbe Sheetz gas station reported a suspicious vehicle parked outside the store late last week. By the time authorities arrived the vehicle and it's driver were gone. As of yet no explinations have been given.